I’m scared to talk to the one person I trust most. I feel like I can’t go to you. & I need you. I’m crying. I can’t stop thinking. My head is spinning. This feeling sucks. 😔

It hurts to think you might be giving your all for nothing. To reach but not touch. Shes happy. Very happy. Too happy. She’ll jinx it. them. Is he capable of loving anything? Of loving her? Her as a whole? She should never have to question his love. But why does he make his love questionable? She tells herself time & time again, “this times different…I’ll walk away if anything..” But how? How do you put so much time & love & energy into something…then giveup on it? But then how do you put up with something from someone who knows what they’re doing isn’t right? Is her hurt not enough?  Why test it? Why make her feel this way? Now she questions rather she even knows what love is. You love her. You want her. You need her. But you show your attention elsewhere. Why should she stay? & if she were to walk away? How would you cope? Does the thought of the disappearance of her presence ever cross your mind? Does it hurt? Hurt like you hurt her?  She knows you don’t deserve her. But shes afraid to admit it.She loves you, you fool. You’ve driven her away. She’ll stick by her word this time. “Don’t fuck this up..please don’t.” She whispers to herself. I just hope you don’t.

*fingers crossed*